I spent almost 45 years of my life being told that I’m too sensitive and that my dreams were too big – by the people who matter the most to me.
It was so much a part of my life that I just got used to it…. even after I moved from Michigan to Colorado, I still tolerated the comments. The sarcasm.
To the point that even hearing the word tolerate now makes my skin crawl!!
When I lost Jim – I was also, literally, lost. I was taking care of my back post – surgery, and I was taking care of Sassy. Those were the things I knew I was committed to doing.
Beyond that, I had absolutely no clue what was next. Or why.
The universe (maybe Jim!) put my lifelong mentor, Jack Canfield, in my path and suddenly I was surrounded by people who actually saw me for me. The people who embrace my sensitivity and see it as my gift.
The people who believe in me and my dreams. Unconditionally. They actually encourage me to dream bigger. Imagine that!!
I’ve spent the past five plus years being thoroughly intentional about any and everything I allow in my life. Food. Friends. Chemicals. You name it.
I already lived through the most horrific loss. I don’t need to tolerate more bs or negativity in this world! My life is difficult enough. I choose to be around things and people who are positive. Supportive.
But apparently I needed another lesson. A tune up. A reminder. Because while I was visiting last week, I decided to share a new dream that recently developed. And no sooner were the words out of my mouth than I realized my lesson.
Don’t tell your dreams to people who will shoot them down. That’s absurdity if I ever heard it
Just think about who you choose to share them with. The same is true for who you share your wins with, or your bad days. Consider what you’re looking for and if that person is capable of giving you that feedback.
I have a ton of other people I can share my dreams with, and they’ll absolutely have positive reactions. That doesn’t mean that it still wouldn’t be nice to hear it from certain people –
We just don’t get to make those decisions. We might not get to hear it from the people we want to hear it from the most. That doesn’t mean we don’t get to hear it at all.
I repeat: That doesn’t mean we don’t get to hear it at all.
I want to point out that I took this as a lesson. Old Sam would have easily beaten herself up (for days!!) over this situation which absolutely gets us nowhere. It’s a recipe for feeling worse which also gets us nowhere.
There’s always something to learn, and that helps us grow. Pay attention to how you handle your ups and downs. We all have them, but some people stay up longer than others, and similarly – some people stay down longer.
I prefer to stay up! And learning, instead of punishing myself, has been the biggest difference maker.
Sometimes the lesson isn’t clear. I still know that there’s a lesson, and I know I’ll figure it out along the way. Trust the journey.
That’s what got me here. I went from being absolutely lost, miserable, and doubtful that I’d smile again let alone laugh or have dreams to having the biggest dreams imaginable.
And I laugh all the time now.
I still would trade it all to have Jim back by my side. In a heartbeat.
But that’s not an option.
So it’s up to me to decide what’s next. And it’s up to you.
It’s not easy.
It takes time.
There are ups and downs.
But there are also the things we learn along the way that make the journey less bumpy. Choosing your people.
Choose who you share your dreams with. Nobody, I repeat, nobody is worth losing yourself, your dreams, your confidence, your path, your ANYTHING for.
It’s your journey. It’s your life. Live it YOUR way!
Starting can be as easy as sending an email. Or joining an online group. I created The Griefhab Community so people have a place to heal their own way – at their own pace.
There’s unconditional support from others who get it, resources, my weekly live show Picking Up the Pieces, and so much more.
I also have even more support in my Team Ruthless Group. We meet every Wednesday plus every holiday because this group knows that’s when they need the most support.
You get to decide what it looks like and what works for you! Just take that first step
Please know that you can reach out anytime:
2519 S. Shields st ste 1k, fort collins, co 80526
online, remote services available
phone : +1 (248) 730-5544