I really cannot believe it’s December. I also really cannot believe it’s approaching 5 years since I lost Jim. Thanksgiving in Michigan without him was hard. It wasn’t obvious to others, but I really did go through so many emotions. And – I shouldn’t be surprised by this – someone told me that they “had enough of my feelings” Someone important to me, I might add. And so, in a blink – things became clear.
I’m proud of what I stand for.
I’m proud that I’m making a life for myself without Jim. I’m proud that I have my emotions – and that I share them! And I’m proud that I walked away from that conversation better. Stronger. Because what you think of me is none of my business. I let that comment get to me. I’m human…
But after a few moments – I recognized that it’s their loss. It’s a reflection of their character – not mine! I’ve been through the biggest loss – I’m now extremely intentional about what and who I let into my life. I need people who accept me for me – whatever that looks like. Emotions included. I’ve had very few such people in my life. Jim made up for all of that – with one smile. He loved and accepted me for me. Unconditionally. So I’ve lost him, and I’ve also lost that person who believes in me. The one who cheers me on instead of questioning me. The one who believes in me more than I believe in myself.
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