What a football week. One of the things Jim and I instantly connected over was our mutual loveof sports. Especially our mutual love of football. Our wedding tables were named in honor of our hometown teams…. Jim wasn’t allowing a Cowboys anything at our wedding 😂 So football without Jim was difficult… for a long time. Watching at all, let alone actually going to a game. But I got there, and this season I finally felt like my old self, actually enjoying the game again.
And then Damar Hamlin collapsed on the field. They reported that he was receiving CPR, and I’m telling you – I was transported back to the very moments I lost Jim.
And I’m not the only one. I’ve talked to so many people over the last week who were triggered in some way by what we all saw on national tv. And here’s the thing…. I’m absolutely thrilled that Hamlin is ok. I really thought he didn’t make it. And I’ve been following his recovery like it’s my job.
But I’m also human. And I can’t stop myself from thinking that Jim could still be here if he had a medical staff and defibrillator nearby.
I thought it, I admit it. And then I felt like an absolutely horrible person for thinking it! But it’s true. Damar Hamlin is alive because he received immediate medical attention, including CPR. Thank goodness!Jim, and most of the rest of the world, lay there waiting until EMS arrived to begin CPR. I hope this changes in my future. I hope to live in a world with defibrillators and CPR trained staff everywhere I go – so that no one else faces haunting “what ifs” like mine. I want to live in a world where everyone receives a superstar immediate response. If I can’t live in this world with Jim, I’m going to work on making it a better world for everyone in it.
I hadn’t planned to watch any football this past weekend. I was upset the world got back to football conversations in the midst of life and death. And then Damar Hamlin woke up. Among his first written words were “Did we win the game?” And as quickly as the world stopped to pray for Hamlin and his recovery, it just as quickly returned to January Football Conversations. The Playoffs! And I was again excited to watch the games… for entirely new reasons. My favorite moments were when both teams met midfield before the game started to come together in prayer. I hope this continues forever.I loved seeing ALL of the stadiums filled with “3s” everywhere and shirts and signs showing love for Hamlin.
To everyone who struggled through this, or through anything for that matter – let’s take away something positive from this experience. And, by the way, it’s ok if you’re still struggling. We all have our own ways of recovering from trauma, at our own pace. Just remember how last week started, and then came full circle to end the week. Hold on to that. Tightly.
No matter where you are. No matter what you’re going through. Even when it seems completely out of reach, there’s still hope. The world recovered through discussing the event. Through discussing feelings. Through connecting – because everyone was hurting. And that’s the world we live in, folks. One where everyone is hurting. They’re hurting in different ways, but everyone is dealing with something. So remember to discuss the events in your life. Discuss your feelings! Connect with others who understand and get through it together. This isn’t the first blog I planned to write in 2023. But life happened. I made adjustments. The world made adjustments. And it’s ok to adjust – during a crisis AND on an ordinary day. Take care of YOU. Take care of your loved ones. Take care of each other.
If you need a supportive group to get through life’s ups and downs with, consider Team Ruthless. This is a group devoted completely to getting support – your way! We have weekly calls to deal with whatever life throws our way, and we have virtual get togethers on EVERY holiday. Some people are alone on the holidays. Other need to decompress after chaotic family events. We ALL need a place to just be ourselves!! We’d love to have you, and we’re even having a virtual get together on January 16th – Martin Luther King Day.
I said EVERY holiday and I’m not kidding. I’m sending each and every one of you hugs and love after the emotional start we’ve all had this 2023. Reach out anytime, and remember – you’re not alone
Hopefully this blog has provided some comfort, education or awareness. If you know someone who will benefit from reading this blog, please share it.
Connect with me anytime by email or join The Griefhab Community for unlimited access to me, resources, and others who get it!
You can hear more of my thoughts on my Podcast The Be Ruthless Show available on iTunes and Spotify and anywhere Podcasts are available.
By making noise and breaking stigmas we can make the world a better place.
2519 S. Shields st ste 1k, fort collins, co 80526
online, remote services available
phone : +1 (248) 730-5544